I’m married

Bill wakes up at home with a huge hangover.<>

He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table.<>

He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed.<>

Bill looks around the room and sees that it is in a perfect order, spotless, clean.<>

So’s the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table “Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love you.”<>

So he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper.<>

His son is also at the table, eating. Bill asks, “Son, what happened last night?”<>

His son says, “Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and delirious.<>

Broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door.<>

” Confused, Bill asks, “So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?”<>

His son replies, “Oh that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off you said, “Lady leave me alone, I’m married‘!”<>

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